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First Things First

Updated: Sep 20, 2020

Sometimes we can't help but judge others based on their looks. That can go both ways. The question is: How often do we turn out to be right?

Hey, you! Welcome! If you took the time to check out my Home Page or if you read a little bit about me, you probably already saw my cute little picture and came up with some conclusions about me. If that is the case . . . HOLD ON A SECOND, buddy! Not everything is what it seems, right? I will explain.

“Here she comes . . ." he laughed. "The Little Sea Monster back from the beach!"

Spoiler alert! In case you visualized a fifth grader or a mean older brother saying those words, you are completely wrong. My parents were friends with some folks who owned an RV. They would take me on trips with them since their daughter didn't have any sisters, just like I didn't. And those hurtful words were spoken by my friend's dad making fun of little me.

But don't feel bad for me! Every time he called me that, even knowing part of it was kind of true, I smiled at him and thought to myself: What an idiot! What kind of person needs to say that to a child?! On the other hand, I was a bit used to similar comments from other kids, and after all, I enjoyed spending time with his daughter who was a couple of years older than me. Sometimes, I would sleep over, and to be quite honest, at that point in my life I was just glad I had someone to call a friend, considering that besides the fact that I was convinced I was an ugly child, I was also fat. That didn't matter much to me since I knew I was a pretty nice kid and was an even better friend.

Growing up as the youngest of three and being the only girl was hard. My brothers didn't make it any easier. The oldest one was the smart one. The next was the good-looking one, and I . . . Well, I was just there. Their little sister. Not as bright, not too cute. There wasn't much left for me, except for the fact that I enjoyed my own company when I wasn't with a friend or my cousin.

Back then, I learned that caring about the people that were kind to me was way more important than wasting time being sad over the unkind things losers had to say about me. Also, that's when I learned to never forget the ones who truly appreciated me for who I was, regardless of how I looked.

When I was about thirteen years old, my classmates started to date, so I decided it was time to take action. After all, buying a bunch of beautiful new clothes wasn't going to do it for me. My family and I went on vacation, and we got back, I had lost so much weight my school friends couldn't believe it. It's not like I became super skinny, but I wasn't overweight anymore. I felt good about myself, but I didn't forget I was still the same person and that was an amazing thing!

When I get compliments today about how I look, I remember that's actually not everything there is. We are all much more than how we look. We are what we learn from life and what we value in ourselves, even if it seems nobody else does. Did you see the smile in the picture on the top of the page? Well, it didn't always exist. It improved over the years.

The truth is . . . It is so unfortunate when people judge us based on our looks. That goes both ways. I never thought it would happen again until I moved to the United States. After helping out a new friend, a girl that was part of the same exchange program as me, she told me she was very surprised by the advice and life experiences I shared with her. She said she never expected such wisdom from a person like me.

"Like me?"
"Yes. Looking at you, I thought you were just a spoiled girl who always had everything you wanted."

Well, little did she know, but she was speaking to . . .




Monster . . .

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